Monday, April 25, 2011

Bad Mommy Moments

Bad mommy moments are a part of life, and I've come to accept that I have my shortcomings when it comes to being a parent. That doesn't mean I like it, but I know that I'm not perfect and that I'm constantly learning. I think it's a good thing that I can realize that I've done something wrong and try to fix it. Every time I lose my cool, every time I react badly or just don't have the patience to be the mom that I want to be, I know that I have the chance to say I'm sorry and not repeat my actions.

Today I had a really bad mommy moment. Brenden and Lauren were playing in his room and I ran into Lauren's room to throw something away in her trashcan. When I walked back in I saw Brenden laying on his bed with Lauren in front of him standing on the floor. He had a hold of her hands and shoved as hard as he could to make her fall down. All I could think about was that her head was going to hit the corner of his cabinet. I jumped over the bed to grab her and on the way I smacked Brenden's leg. I wasn't even thinking about it. We don't spank or smack his hands so I'm not sure why that was my first instinct. I immediately felt terrible. He was totally shocked, too.

While I tended to Lauren I sent Brenden to time out. When he was done I asked him what he had done wrong and made him apologize to us. Then, I explained that I should not have hit him and that I was going to go in time out, too. He told me when to come out and I apologized and said I wouldn't do it again.

Apologizing to him is much easier than I thought it would be. I'm hoping it teaches him that even though he may make some bad decisions, an apology goes a long way, as well as making sure that the bad behavior changes. I know it will also teach him that his mommy isn't perfect, that I'm going to make mistakes, but that I'm doing my best.

Now I just have to forgive myself for doing something that I said I never wanted to do. It's so much easier for me to forgive other people. There's one more thing I can work on.


Stacy said...

I hope you aren't being too hard on yourself! Just from the interaction we have online, I can tell you're a terrific mother. Your kids are blessed to have you. There should be more parents as loving and kind and patient and as devoted to being good parents as you.

The Kellys said...

Thank you. I'm sure trying!

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