Friday, April 2, 2010

Different Perspective

The last few weeks of my pregnancy with Brenden were nothing like this time around. With Brenden I wasn't in very much pain, I actually had energy to get things done, and I was a complete nervous mess. I was so READY for him to be here, to see him, to hold him. I was ready for that "Oh wow!" moment that I just knew I was going to have. (Yeah, that didn't happen.) I was so upset that I didn't go into labor at 37 weeks so I could experience all of those things. Obviously it didn't go exactly as I expected.

Since I had a ton of time just laying around doing nothing on Tuesday, I started thinking about how I would feel if they sent me home. I was so upset when we made our "trial run" with Brenden. Didn't they know that I was going to go into labor soon and they were going to feel silly for not keeping me there? (That joke was totally on me.) This time I actually expected to go home. I didn't make Tim take me, I didn't have my bag, I didn't call anyone to tell them I was going. I think that made a big difference in how I dealt with it.

The other difference this time is how little anxiety I actually feel about her arrival. Don't get me wrong, I'm ready to be done. My stomach hurts, my back hurts, the heartburn still stinks, and I'm still having problems with my heart racing and my breathing being difficult. Obviously I'm not looking forward to labor. I'm not a fan of pain! But what I'm not doing is stressing about when she's going to show up. Those last 3 weeks with Brenden, especially the last few days, I was crazy. I was practically shaking all day with anxiety and cried every night. I obsessed over every twinge, every pain. Now I know that Lauren will show up when she's going to show up, no matter what I do or how much I think about it. We're officially in April and, one way or another, she'll be born this month. I know that pregnancy does not last forever, which is something that was hard for me to grasp the first time around.

Now, if I'm 2 weeks past my due date and she still hasn't shown up, I think I'll be singing a different tune.


New Girl on Post said...

I think you have a good perspective about it, although I hope for your sake she shows up sooner than later.

Just a tidbit for you, I was supposed to be born at the end of June and showed up mid-July. I was one of THOSE babies. ;)

Kimberly said...

Both my babies were born late...P was induced a week late, they wouldn't let me go any longer, A had her induction scheduled for Thursday, and I really thought that would be it as I was 0 dialated at that week check up, but she decided to come on Sunday, on her own. It was easier with #2,I remember we were waiting for laundry to finish in the dryer before we went to the hospital, I didn't even have a bag packed for P. It was on my to do list, but not a reality yet I guess. Here's to coping better this time!

The Kellys said...

I'm sure trying! And I keep hearing horror stories about babies that don't show up until 2 weeks after their due dates. I am going to do everything I can to NOT be that lady. :)

I have my bag packed! And the carseat in the car! Last night was rough...couldn't sleep and my back is killing me. Nothing is really "happening" though so I'm just stuck feeling miserable.

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