I left the lovely, weekly urine specimen, did my weight check (ick), and had my blood pressure taken by the nurse. The doctor checked Lauren's heart rate, which was great, measured my stomach (I didn't ask), and then did the seriously uncomfortable cervical check. That was when the first blow came...I'm still only 1-2 cm dilated and 50% effaced. After all of the discomfort and nightly exhaustion I hadn't progressed AT ALL. I almost cried right then and there. I had tried to prepare myself to hear that but I guess I hadn't done a very good job. I didn't expect to hear I was 4 cm and completely effaced, I just thought I might have actually progressed. It's hard to feel like you're just stalled and that all that pain and frustration isn't doing a bit of good.
Then the doctor asked the nurse to take my blood pressure lying down, which I thought was strange. It's not something he normally does so I asked if it was elevated. I think he said I was 140 over 88, which is higher than normal. Laying down it was 138 over 82, which was better, but still higher than he wanted it to be. He asked if I had ever had blood pressure problems when I was pregnant with Brenden and I told him the only time it jumped up was during labor. He told me to get dressed and that he would be right back. I was just a little confused.
It only took a few minutes for him to return. "How about Monday?" he asked. My response..."To what? Have the baby?" Like he would be talking about anything else! It just wasn't something I expected him to say, I guess. He had me follow him to the nurses desk where my regular nurse was trying to finagle an appointment for me. Eventually my doctor had to get on the phone to try to work the system. Since he's going to be gone this weekend for vacation Sunday was out. Monday was a no go. Tuesday was also unavailable. "Wednesday?!?" I screeched. That's another week!
(I tried to talk him into putting me in right there. Unfortunately he had delivered 4 babies today and I think his head was already on vacation even though his body was still in his office. "Give me an epidural and 3 hours and we can have a kid in no time," I tried to explain. No go.) :(
Yep, Wednesday at 7 pm I am scheduled to be induced. I made it all the way to the car before I called Tim and broke down. I'm not sure what was so awful about it. Obviously I'm disappointed that my contractions just haven't done anything, although I should have been expecting it since that is exactly what happened with Brenden. I'm just so tired. Another part of me was angry that they couldn't get me scheduled earlier, especially since my doctor put Monday in my head. Silly doctors, making promises they can't keep.
I think the worst part for me is the fact that I'm actually being induced. How crazy is that? I'm absolutely not the first woman to be induced. I would say 80% of my friends have been induced. I think I'm just afraid of the unknown. I don't know how I'll react to the pitocin. I don't know how quickly I will be able to get my epidural. I don't know how long and painful the entire experience will be. Of course, thinking logically, I don't know how it it will be if I just happen to go into labor before next week, either. It's silly of me to obsess over things that I could never know.
I'm trying to relax and take comfort in the fact that, no matter what, next week at this time I will officially be having a baby. Also, if nothing happens before then (The check today has really made the contractions I'm having more painful. It's like my belly is one, big, never-ending cramp.) I'll know exactly when I'm going in. I'll be prepared, my house will be clean, I'll know both Tim and my doctor will be there, and Brenden is all set up to spend some time with one of his favorite people, Susan.
When we explained that next week he would get to hang out with Susan while mommy and daddy went to the doctor to have Lauren, Brenden actually cheered! "Yay! Baby Lauren is coming!" That kind of enthusiasm is infectious. I think I'll keep telling him about it just to hear him be excited. Do you hear that, Lauren? We are ALL ready to meet you!